7/3/09- Don’t quit!

 Today was my first day of orientation with the LEAP schools.  I cannot put in words what I experienced today, but for the sake of this blog, I will try to share some of what I experienced.  We accompanied some of the LEAP students to visit a drug rehabilitation center for teens who have been to prison for substance abuse and crime, called REALISTIC.  In true South African style, the facilitator warmed us up with about 15 min of singing and dancing (that means that we all had to get silly and pretend we had coordination).  This really helped me come out of my shell and feel like part of the group.

Then we were prompted to break into small groups consisting of two “Realists” (students from REALISTIC), a LEAP student and a Teach with Africa fellow (me).  Each group member was told to share with the group why we were there and what we hope to do in the next few months.  The Realists started out.  As the first Realist opened up, I couldn’t help but notice the many scars across his face and wonder what he had gone through to get those.  He shared that he had fallen into a life of crime, which landed him in prison.  After getting out of prison he was prompted my both his ex-girlfriend and family member to become connected with REALISTIC.

Our conversation did not focus so much on what he did to get into prison, but what he has gone through after getting out and trying to fit back into society.  Because he decided to join this rehabilitation program it basically means that he can no longer hang out with any of the people who he used to call his buddies.  No more gangs, drugs or whatever else got him in trouble.  While this sounds all great, it has basically left him lonely.  While all of his past influences were negative, they were his support.  He shared with us how hard it is for him now to get through the nights when he just has to stay home alone with nothing to do.  He said that one of his coping mechanisms is to write.  Although none of our group members had dealt with the same exact scenarios that he had dealt with, his loneliness really struck a cord with us.  We all, in some way, had decided to leave something comforting in our lives (whether it be an unhealthy relationship or vice) to make a positive change in our lives.  This is not comfortable or easy.  We all shared that pain.

When it came time for me to share why I was there, I did not know what to say.  How can any of my life experiences even begin to compare with anything these students are facing?  All I could do was be honest and just share where I am at in my life and teaching career.  I told my group that although America may seem to be a perfect place (since all they know is from reruns of The Bold and the Beautiful that are played on their TV stations), I see many students with substance abuse issues on a daily basis.  I shared that students come to my class drunk, high and very upset due to problems in their lives.  I explained that I am in South Africa to see what the LEAP and REALISTIC programs are doing to help their students, so I can learn how to better address the students in my classes that are struggling.

After moving on and allowing other students to share, the Realist student made a point to ask me more about my students. He could not believe that my classroom was not the perfect picture painted on TV.  I shared with him that many students that I teach also do not have much support in their lives.  For many students, their role models are musicians who preach about drugs, alcohol, and treating women horribly. This sparked a pretty interesting conversation about the hip-hop music they hear in the townships.  I asked if there is any positive messages in the hip-hop that he listens to. He shared the lyrics of a song that meant a lot to him.  In the song the musician is in his home alone, dealing with the same loneliness that he now experiences in his rehabilitation.  The musician has to make the choice to either stay inside away from trouble, or go outside and join his gang friends.  In the end of the song the musician decides to go outside to join his gang friends.  In the end, the musician decides to “leave his god in the house” and goes outside to join his gang friends.  The musician ends up feeling great remorse and is writing the song from prison.  The realist felt a very strong connection to this song because this is exactly where he sees himself- at the point where he is either going to succumb to the loneliness and go outside, or just stay inside.

He told me with much pride and almost a bit of shyness that he had written a paper where he had to explain his dream vacation.  He had chosen America.  He had learned about the United States not only from TV, but also from music.   I told him that he needs to keep that dream alive.  Whether I think that he will ever be able to come to America or not, if this is a thread of a dream that he has, I want him to hold onto it.  I hope to connect him with one of my students so he can continue to learn about the real America and continue to improve his life.

The day ended with the facilitator reading a poem about not quitting the path they are already on.  Since they have made the choice to be part of the REALISTIC program, they have already made a choice in the right direction.